On a serious note

It has been nine years and at some point tomorrow  I will still get a tear in my eye and a lump in my throat.  Everyone says, "It's one of those things where you will always remember where you were when it happened."  That part is easy for me.  I took off September 10th to finish packing for our second trip to Italy on vacation.  I landed in Rome just before the first plane hit and got to the hotel within moments of the second plane hitting.  We called my mom to let her know we made it safely only to have her tell us to turn on the news immediately.


Not experiencing the tragedy in America was probably a blessing in some ways but the feeling of isolation in Europe was profound.  There was an outpouring of support from most people we saw but that made us feel even more like we were under a microscope.


My immediate response was abject fear for my friends.  Deb Largen (Bloom, at the time) lived in Albany but worked in the city almost every week.  Her 'home away from home' was the Marriott across from the Trade Center.  Her former boyfriend, John Reo, worked for Cantor Fitzgerald.  Our close friends JP and Molly Urrabazo were in New York for work/fun and we weren't sure which dates (We later found out they had breakfast at Windows on the World just a few days earlier).  We amassed a $600 phone bill trying to track everyone down. 


We talked to JP and Molly and were relieve to find they were already back in Austin.  Thank goodness for fortunate scheduling.  Then I talked to Deb.  She wasn't in NYC that week.  Minor miracle...but John was at work that morning and he was unaccounted for.  We would (months later) get confirmation he was in the office when the building collapsed.  


John was a late bloomer who had finally found his way and was on his way toward a very promising career.  We had played pool and had dinner a few times during my time at GE when he and Deb were dating.  Nine years later and I am still outraged at the indiscriminate way that John and the other 2,976 souls were stopped in the prime of their lives.  There is no solution, military or judicial, that will make me feel better.  Nothing will bring them back to their families.  I kiss my wife and kids every time I think about it.


I don't want to talk about our vacation or our story over the next ten days.  To summarize:

• We were terrified
• We were numb
• We were sad
• We were stuck in Italy with no way to get anywhere
• We tried to make the most despite the sadness
• We met very nice people from many countries and cultures that grieved with us
• Our flight home was the first Trans-Atlantic flight since 9/11 for the crew we flew with and they seemed as shocked and terrified to be on the plane as we were
• We decided on the way home it was time to start trying to have a baby

Every September I get sad, mad, then relieved it wasn't worse.  I look back now and still have great pride in how the country reacted in the aftermath.  But nine years later I hate many of the things it has done to our country.  No soapbox today, but all the people that used this horrendous event to drive a wedge and create fear, uncertainty, and panic should be ashamed.  They have shown the worst side of humanity when so many were showing what is best in us with their willingness to sacrifice.

I don't ever want it to get easier.  I want it to hurt like new every year.  Those 2,977 deserve at least that much.